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Yesterday when I was out watering my veggies the neighbor came running up to me. She doesn't know my name, obviously, because she was all like "You, hey you! I have a question for you!"

It immediately set me off and I responded, "What do you want?" Not the nicest thing to say, but that's my default when someone I don't really know comes running up to me.

She wanted to know if I ever got woken up by the crack heads. And I said yes, of course. She wanted to know if I ever called the cops on them. I said we did when we first moved in, but we basically got the brush off so we gave up. She said the cops told her basically the same thing.

She lives right next door to the crack house. Her driveway is next to their driveway and when they come home from work they always have to yell at some crack head to get out of their driveway so they can park their cars off the street. Almost every day.

There's usually not any parking on the street anyway, because of all the drug traffic.

I am totally shocked the crack heads don't park in our driveway, especially since we don't have a car and never use it. I guess it's just too far away to walk or something.

This neighbor was so desperate and upset. I don't blame her. I've been her. She said they thought about selling their house and moving. Been there too. If we had decent neighbors back in Roch I know we would have figured out how to keep our home, despite all the other problems. But it can really drive you crazy. It's horrible to feel helpless.

If the cops don't care, you're fucked. They get to pick and choose who they arrest, and sometimes they have ulterior motives.

The crack heads pretty much leave us alone, but they are always in the neighbors driveway and yard and yelling at them, it's a sad sight.

I felt bad for her, but I don't think that even if every single person in this area called the cops on them, anything would come of it. I told her they probably have a cop in the family, she said they have an informant living there.

Not sure how she knows that. I'm guessing that is just her guess as to why they get away with all they do, just like we speculate they are related to a cop or someone "important."

I hope she doesn't move. If she does, the crack heads will get a relative to move in and it will be even worse. The lady a few houses down died and the crack heads got relatives to move in there. They have kids and older women living there, so it's not as bad, but the guys do walk back and forth between the houses pretty often, and our house is right in between.

If we didn't have a fence, they'd be in our yard all the time, I know it. Cutting through it, hanging out in it, just acting like they are kings of the fucking hill.

I'm working on being better with money. Maybe someday we can move. Maybe someday I can live somewhere more peaceful. I must have some shit karma, is all I can come up with, and I'm still working on that as well.

But living on disability is very limiting on what I can afford to spend on a place to live. On everything, really. But every day I am so thankful I don't have to try to deal with working. I really think I'd end up in the hospital or in prison.

The little pills they throw at us crazy people don't work like magic bullets. We don't swallow them and all of a sudden we can work full time or have "normal" relationships or stop being sick in any way. They just make us sedated enough where we aren't especially a threat to ourselves or others.

It's a sad state of this place. Meaning, the world.

10:43 AM - Thursday, Jun. 22, 2023

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